I'm struggling so much right now.

I've been having panic attacks and mental breakdowns. I feel like I can't do anything right. I feel like I'm failing myself and everyone around me. The situation that I was in impacted me more than I realized and it's now just hitting me.

But I know that this is part of the journey and it takes time. I've endured so much for years, I cannot expect to be "healed" in just four months. Like the gym, you will have good days and bad days. One day you've made great progress, the other day you discover a weakness and it takes you down. That is progress.

I was treated so inhumane. I was brought to one of my lowest points by not only you, but your entire family. July 4, 2023. I was put in a state of panic. I tried everything, and it still wasn't enough. I felt like I was failing everyone and myself.

And then out of nowhere, while still in a state of panic, I was hit in the face by a ball at full speed.

Glasses fell off. My cheek was bruised. I was in so much shock I cried and left. No one checked in on me, no one wanted to ask, everyone pretended like it didn't happen.

I felt so unwanted, unwelcomed, unreal. I wasn't anyone anymore. I felt so lonely.